I have met a lot of beautiful people and have witnessed too many of them suffer to the point where they would rather take their own life then continue to endure this reality. 💔
One thing that has happened to me a lot in my lifetime is when people see change or think you have changed they want to keep you. Sometimes (like the picture above) you graduate to a higher version of yourself. No matter what you say or do no one can see your path but you.
How do you function in a society that doesn’t like change? Anything that is out of their standards are looked down upon. One judgement of you, a lie, one moment, and all of a sudden you are shunned and are now leper to society.
The fact is society doesn’t want to talk about suicide, mental health or what goes on behind closed doors. What about friendship? Some of my closest friends chose to walk away with out even a conversation to try to understand me. No compassion from your closest friends – the ones you call sisters…
So if family and friends are not willing to even sit down and talk with you, what do you do? Unfortunately this is easily when people say why….? Why would I want to stay in this reality?
When I was seven years old, I was so upset with life I laid on my bedroom floor and scratched my leg until I bled. Afterwards looking at my self inflicted wound I realized that was not the way, and vowed to never hurt myself intentionally again. Little did I know at the time how important and beautiful that promise to myself was.
As I got older and my life was finally starting to shape into exactly everything I wanted… that’s when my world crumbled to the point where I was no longer recognizable to myself. At the lowest point of my life I was so toxed out from the “new meds” (that were supposed to help me) the toxicity sent me into shock and death came to me… and I said – No. I wanted to stay here to potentially show others what I have seen.
And even if people do not see, just being by here, living, will help this world because if everything is energy the more love and happiness I create in my life will radiate out into the world 🥰 🌎 ✨️
When I find myself bothered by things that have happened in my life I have tried not to think or dwell. One of the best stories my friend told me is that when he went hitch hiking across America (yah know back when you could do fun stuff like that) his friend would come across something he didn’t want to think about and put his hand up and pull the chain like flushing a toilet – like the toilets over in Europe. It is just that easy. 😁 And it is!
To put things in Perspective
Nightbirde’s beauty has touched my soul. It felt like I was up there on stage singing one of the many lyrics that I have written down and burned. Take time to listen to your friend’s and family they are a gift.
It is okay to feel sad, cry, and express your emotions.
I don’t have all the answers but I am still here to talk and listen and spread compassion like confetti on New Years Eve.